Thinking Aloud on Easter Sunday

Movements, and sounds.

Regular readers will know that I am not religious. I actually forgot that last Friday was Good Friday, and I was surprised that the supermarket is closed today. For those of you that celebrate this season in that way, I wish you a Happy Easter, and a peaceful weekend.

But this morning I woke up hearing a noise. It took a while for me to realise that I had made that noise, something resembling a strangled cry, as I turned over in bed. My body was telling me that I had been in one position too long, and that it also didn’t like the amount of effort required to change direction.

I can’t really remember the first time I started to make noises associated with the simple process of moving around. But I do remember my Mum having to make some sort of ‘grunt’ to assist her to get out of an armchair. And when she sat back down in one, she would let out a sound something like a long “Oooff”, as she rested back against the cushion. At the time, I used to find this amusing. Little did I know that those sounds would soon be coming from my own mouth.

It seems that I can no longer rise from the sofa, or sit back on one, without associating the movement with an audible groan or strange cry. I have actually tried to stop it happening, but with no success. And it is not restricted to sitting and standing. Scratching a particularly itchy insect bite last year, I was shocked to hear myself letting out some kind of high-pitched wail as I did so. At first, I didn’t even realise it was me making the noise.

Settling down in bed unleashes a repertoire of sighs that could well be set to music. Stretching out under the duvet has to be attempted carefully, in case of attracting a bout of muscle cramp in one leg. If that happens, it will be accompanied by cries of pain that are something like those heard on a Maternity Labour Ward. If I escape that, then cat-like purs of contentment issue from my lips, followed by expulsions of breath that can rustle the pages of a magazine, inflating my cheeks until I resemble the jazz trumpeter, Dizzy Gillespie.

Getting into my low corner bath is easy enough, but climbing back out after bathing is another matter entirely. I have to adopt the tried and tested ‘extrication’ method. Hands grasp the sides, legs and feet drawn up to get purchase on the bottom of the bath, then up in a single movement, accompanied by my personal bath grunt, sounding something like ‘Aaargh’. Without that grunt, I am convinced I would never emerge from the bath water.

Outside the home, I cannot avoid my new ‘language’. Climbing into the driving seat of my car doesn’t appear to require much effort, but it is always accompanied by a distinct ‘Oooff’, which makes me remember my Mum, every time I set off to drive somewhere. After a drive of less than thirty minutes, getting out of that same seat usually necessitates a few ‘Ows’, before I am on solid ground.

When you reach the age that you begin to hear unfamiliar and unnecessary sounds coming from you, try to remember this post.

Read it again, and realise that it is all just part of getting old.

60 thoughts on “Thinking Aloud on Easter Sunday

  1. Great post πŸ™‚ Though I am far from there, based on my observations from older folk, I have seen that getting older can carry some physical drawbacks as you so eloquently state here. Anyway, keep up the great work as always πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I too feel your pain… I had to for go long, bubble clad soaks in the bath tub and move to showers only. Oh how I miss those days with a candle lit and old time music playing in the background. Gone also are the days of sitting or rising without a moan to mark the occasion ~ not that long ago in memory was a feat done in silence. I truly feel your pain as the coming years will bring more occasions for me to remember my grandparents struggle with simple tasks. Thank you for this post as I don’t feel so alone in the misery of aging….Take care, Laura (sorry I’ve been away for such a long time)

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  3. It’s good to make noises…

    Hello darkness, my old friend
    I’ve come to talk with you again
    Because a vision softly creeping
    Left its seeds while I was sleeping
    And the vision that was planted in my brain
    Still remains
    Within the sound of silence

    Lyrics by “Sigh” and “Garn!”

    Like

  4. Laughing Aloud on Easter Sunday! I ask Cyberspouse if they are normal grunts or if something more serious is occuring in case I’m supposed to be sympathetic. I did hear of a wife busy in the kitchen who assumed the grunts and noises coming from the living room were the normal for her husband, but after a period of silence she went in with his cup of tea to discover he had actually died!

    Liked by 4 people

  5. A funny insight into humanity, Pete, for the elderly.
    However, there is a language young people have, too. Special effects sounds for every movement. I remember saying to my kids over and over, “Don’t make noise just to make noise.”
    Being quiet was a hard thing to make my kids do.
    Now I am older. Since when does a yawn have to sound like a bear waking up from hibernation?

    Liked by 3 people

  6. You’re not alone Pete. My knees ache sometimes. I have to rub turmeric oil to get better. I don’t know if it is because of gout or arthritis. Don’t want to go back to the doctor.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. This did make me giggle Pete. I read it out to Phil who also had a good laugh. Then he stood up to go and make a cuppa, his knee gave way and the YOW noise that followed set me off again. Have a peaceful painless Sunday! 🀣

    Liked by 4 people

  8. The older I get the more my body sounds like a bowl of Rice Krispies…Snap, Crackle and Pop….I am with you on the religion thing…I knew it was close when my granddaughter came by mid week and told me she was on Spring Break…..oh well have a great day….chuq

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Well, I’m not old yet, Pete, but you should hear me hollering when I get fatigued, trying to wrestle with my rollator and get sat on it to rest for a while as I gather some small bit of strength….there will be a few choice words at times

    Liked by 1 person

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