There are times…

~ beetleypete

Are there times when you wish that you had done something different? Or times when you regret doing something that has affected you ever since? I know that both apply to me. I wonder if this will provoke thoughts or feelings in some readers? If so, please add your own examples in the comments.

There are times…when I wish that I had gone to university. I have no way of knowing if that would have made my life turn out any differently to what it is now. But I could have gone, and at the time it would have been free of charge too. I should have gone, and perhaps studied one of my passions.

There are times…when I wonder what it might have been like to have had children. Not that it is something I have ever regretted, I assure you. But I have wondered.

There are times...when I regret not going to live abroad, when I had the chance. If only for a while, as it might have been something good to look back on now, and would have undoubtedly broadened my horizons at a fertile time for my mind.

There are times…when I wish I had waited to get married, (the first time) as who knows how my life might have been different had I not spent eight years with someone who almost certainly regretted her decision.

There are times…when I miss London. After spending sixty years there, that’s understandable. But fortunately, it soon passes.

There are times…when I feel I should make more effort to keep in touch with my oldest friends. We are all getting on now, and none of us know how long we will be around.

There are times…when I wish I had developed more practical skills. I have grown up not equipped to do so many basic things, and now have to pay others to do them for me. It’s all very well being able to read Jean-Paul Sartre in French, but that wont help you fix a problem with the plumbing.

There are times...when I wish I was more organised. Surrounded by piles of paperwork, never knowing where anything is, and constantly looking for things I have lost can all become very tiring, believe me.

So there are just a few of my ‘times’. Over to you.

78 thoughts on “There are times…”

  1. There are times I wish I had been more adventurous.
    There are times I wish I had not been such a rule follower.
    There are times I wish I had gone to art school.
    There are times I wish I had not given up my chance to live in England.
    There are times I wish …

    I do not dwell in this space, but I do reflect. Not in a sad or maudlin way. Just in an ‘I wonder” way.

    I am not unhappy with my life. I am very fortunate. But that does not negate the fact that there are things I wish I had done differently.

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    1. Thanks for revisiting the post and adding your thoughts, Maggie.
      I didn’t know you had the chance to live in England. It might well have depended whereabouts in this country you had settled, as to whether or not you would have enjoyed living here.
      Best wishes, Pete.

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      1. Pete, when I was in the military, I became enthralled with England. One of the officers I worked with had been stationed in England and his stories made me want to go there.

        At the same time, my mother’s cancer was progressing at a rapid rate. My parents had moved back home, I had found love with a childhood sweetheart and wanted badly to be home with my family.

        About the time my mother passed away, I received orders to go to Lakenheath (in Suffolk I think). Travel had lost its appeal. I (foolishly) got married and chose to leave the Air Force (an option that no longer exists).

        It was the start of a downward spiral and one of the reasons I sometimes wish I had gone. I think I would have loved it. More than you wanted to know I am sure.

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  4. An interesting list, Pete. I actually didn’t really realise that you didn’t have children. You never mentioned any but the penny just didn’t drop. I sometimes wish that I didn’t feel the weight of my financial responsibilities so heavily and I could take a work sabbatical and I think recently, that we should have left South Africa years ago.

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    1. Thanks, Robbie. I have never been to SA. It looks lovely, but I am also aware of the political issues, crime statistics, and how some families live in high-security homes. Whatever the issues over here, I doubt it will ever be like that.
      As for children, I wrote this in 2012, when very few people knew I had a blog. 🙂

      No children


      Best wishes, Pete.

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  5. Interesting thoughts!! I definitely have those….. especially about getting married at 19 and giving up a higher education in arts….. it took me 18 years to get out of that abuse. Could I have been a artist by now? Maybe…. I believe I have the talent.
    BUT! I’m happy where I am now… if my life had taken a different course, would I still be able to say that I was happy?

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    1. Very true, Rebecca. I suppose the correct answer for all of us, is that we will never know.
      But I am genuinely pleased to hear that you escaped abuse, and found a better life.
      Best wishes, Pete.

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    1. I never did finish that book, David. But I always remember one of his famous quotes.

      ‘It is a puzzling thing. The truth knocks on the door and you say, ‘Go away, I’m looking for the truth,’ and so it goes away. Puzzling.’

      Best wishes, Pete.

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  7. What ifs? I got a degree and now wonder if I’d be better off studying a trade. Actually, I could have done both but a lot of life, especially when young and impressionable, is not entirely in our control.

    And the grass always looks greener elsewhere! 🙂

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  9. The only reflecting I do is in the mirror, and then only occasionally and briefly, which reminds me I’m 6-months overdue for a haircut!
    I’m also pretty certain I should have waited for the rain to stop before I planted the tomatoes, still que sera sera 🙂

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  10. My wish is that I had the same attitude as so many of the others here and didn’t look back. However, I do and am filled with regret. Perhaps I am feeling a little blue today I don’t know, but I certainly have made some poor choices. Sorry to sound maudlin!

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    1. Not at all, Katie. Perhaps this post hit a nerve. I know how you feel. The positive outlook of so many of those who have commented makes me envious. I sincerely hope that you feel better soon. 🙂
      Best wishes, Pete.

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  11. There are times when I wish I could have a do-over on my high school years. That was the only time in my life when I wasn’t happy, and I like the person I have become in the subsequent 40+ years. If I only knew then what I know now.

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    1. The dilemma of hindsight, Pete. If we knew it back then, we might well have changed what happened. And then nothing would be the same. 🙂
      Best wishes, Pete.

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  14. I can’t even begin to list my ‘there are times whens…..’ the sadness that would bring is more than unbearable. I focus on the life I have now, and the life yet to come, it is the only way I’d stay sane.

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    1. Thanks, Dani. The older I get, the more I think about all this ‘stuff’. Most of the time, I find it very interesting to just ‘wonder’. 🙂
      Best wishes, Pete. xx

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  18. Wishing my life were different than it is right now, is just another way of saying I wish I didn’t exist, had never been born, etc. We are a collection of thoughts, memories, judgments, and imagined encounters. We rarely see with any clarity what we are actually doing until much later and then we are dependent upon decayed memories to determine who did what. The imagined individual we believed ourselves to be dies from moment to moment. We have little to zero free will and about the best we can do is what feels the best at any moment, which is what most of us actually do. We are riding a wild, bucking bronco we call our life and all we can do is try to hold on and ride that bastard to a standstill. 🙂

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    2. Thanks for your great comment, Charlie. I don’t ever actually wish that my life was different. But I do ponder on the choices I have made during it. I am well aware that it’s far too late to worry about that now though. 🙂
      Best wishes, Pete.

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  19. i believe regularly reviewing one’s life is a good thing, Pete. i just don’t look too far too long. i focus more on now and forward and continue to get inspired. 🙂

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        1. I agree GP! Had to laugh about “It’s all very well being able to read Jean-Paul Sartre in French, but that wont help you fix a problem with the plumbing”, because i cant imagine Sartre was able to change a light bulb. Lol Michael

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  24. I am amazed by the way I seemed basically to fall into rather than plan my life. I wonder about many things, right now I wonder why I didn’t study more history. I also wonder why I took physical fitness for granted until I lost it and had to go to the gym to regain it. I appreciated this chance to muse with you.

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  25. I know what you mean Pete! So many choices to make in life, and we do the best we can at the time! Some things you can’t change of course, but some you can! You can make more trips to London, for instance. Maybe study things you wished you’d learned earlier. (Piano, for me came late in life, but I’m still endeavoring to learn.) I often wonder about some of the things over which I had little or no control. How they could have turned out worse, but instead worked out for the best! I’m thankful for those! 🙂

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  26. The only way is forward! No doubts that we all feel the same way, even some don’t admit it, and some live in denial… But we are all human, and we all face the same dilemmas! It’s how we deal with them that will define us! Great post!❤️

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      1. You’re not the only one Pete, I can assure you! ☺️ And it can be counter-productive but it can also be helpful and therapeutic, I think! You just need to do it but keep focusing on what is ahead! Thank you so much, I really enjoyed it!🙏

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