Thinking Aloud on A Sunday

~ beetleypete

Young Love.

I woke up thinking about my first crushes on girls today.

I started young, aged just 11. That was undoubtedly precipitated by going to a mixed secondary school at exactly the same time as I started to realise that girls were not just annoying versions of boys who just happened to be unable to pee against a wall.

And we had to sit next to them in class too, as the teachers mixed up the ratios to reduce the natural cheekiness and disruption caused by some boys sitting together. Close up like that, they looked different, and smelled different too. They smelled good. Even with the allowed amount of ‘school’ make-up, some of them started to look really good too. Most of them, truth be told. And they wore unifrorm skirts back then. And it was the 1960s, so some of those skirts were very short. And they no longer wore droopy long socks that kept falling down, Oh no, they had nylon-clad legs that made a swishing sound when they crossed them.

And some of the girls I was sat next to crossed them a lot.

But I was still too young to actually tell a girl that I thought she was pretty. And much too young to let on that I might also have found her sexually attractive. I had to suffer in silence for a year, as I watched their breasts begin to appear, and their confidence grow until they became bolder than any of the boys.

Meanwhile, I transferred my attention to the female teachers, and not just the young ones.

Did they really have to sit on the desk like that? Were they unaware that I could see right up their skirt when they did? And why did so much of their teaching activity require them to bend so low from the waist? God forbid I put my hand up to mention I was having difficulty with something. That would involve her crouching next to my seat at the desk, with her skirt riding up to the tops of her thighs, and the view down her top leaving my legs trembling uncontrollably.

I seemed to spend my days with my gaze constantly switching from looking at any ‘opportunities’ provided by the teacher, to the legs of the girl sat next to me every time I heard that tell-tale ‘swish’. It was like being in the audience on Centre Court at Wimbledon during finals weekend. And woe betide that crossed leg should find itself coming to rest against my grey trousers. Concentration was impossible after that.

It was a wonder I actually learned anything.

When I was twelve and a half, I was approached by a girl from my class who I had hardly thought about. I won’t write her real name, just in case, so let’s call her Ann. She told me that she had decided I could be her boyfriend, so I should walk her home after school and her parents would not be home from work until six. I almost passed out, as I had never encountered such forward behaviour. More importantly, I had no idea what she was expecting me to do in her house that afternoon.

For the rest of that day, Ann held my hand between classes, and made sure to tell her group of friends that I was her boyfriend. During lunch, she asked if I had told my own mates that I had a girlfriend. When I told her I hadn’t, she shook her head. “Are you ashamed of me then?” I tried to explain that I had only known that fact myself since she had told me it earlier, but she wasn’t impressed. “I am thinking of calling off our date then. Wait for me after school, and I will tell you what I’ve decided”. I learned a valuable lesson at that moment.

Whatever I might have thought to the contrary, the girls were in charge.

Ann was by the gate at going home time, and took my hand. The spat from earlier wasn’t mentioned, and we made the short walk to her house with her talking constantly about everything we could do together now that we were a couple. Like going shopping on Saturdays, trips to the cinema, and summer days in the local park. She had obviously thought a lot about our future.

As she reached for her keys, she asked me a question, her expression serious.. “How many girlfriends have you had?” I replied honestly. “None, I’m only twelve”. Her wide grin indicated that I had given the correct answer. “Me neither. No boyfriends that is”.

Once in the hallway, she kicked off her shoes and began kissing me passionately. I remember thinking of two words, ‘warm’, and ‘wet’. This was juvenile kissing between two complete novices. Lips rubbing against each other as she made a sound like a chimp eating an orange. To my surprise and consternation, she led me straight up to her bedroom, telling me to take off my shoes and blazer, and lay down on her candlewick bedspread. I had no idea what she intended to do with me.

What she actually did is fixed in stone in my memory. Hitching up her uniform skirt, she straddled my hips, and leaned forward, enagaging in more of that very slippery kissing as she held my head between her palms in a vice-like grip. When she stopped to get her breath, sounding like a free-diver emerging from the ocean floor, she held my right hand against her chest, pushing it flat over her apple-sized breast. In case I might actually know what to do next, she issued a warning. “Only through my clothes, and only for as long as I say”.

The combination of continuing to be kissed from above whilst squeezing a real boob was bad enough. Add to that her nylon clad thighs gripping my hips with the skill of a professional wrestler, and it was inevitable that I would become ‘aroused’. I prayed that she wouldn’t notice, but my prayers fell on deaf ears. She sat back and stared at the tiny pup tent in my trousers. Her expression changed, and she took my hand off of her chest.

“None of that stuff, thank you. I’m too young to have a baby. I think you’d better go home now”.

As she let me out of the front door, she gave me the bad news.

“Oh, by the way. You’re not my boyfriend anymore”.

54 thoughts on “Thinking Aloud on A Sunday”

    1. I still saw her every day at school, until she was 16. She left school then and got a job. I lost touch with her for a few years until I saw her in a pub one night, when we were both 19. She was already married,to an older-looking guy, and seemed to have ‘aged-up’ to suit that. We didn’t chat long, and certainly didn’t mention that afternoon after school. 🙂
      Thanks, Cheryl.
      Best wishes, Pete.

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  4. My grandchilden are endlessly amused looking at the internet for current pictures of boys I liked to compare with my grade school photos of the same boys. Most of them didn’t age well I must admit!

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  6. The girls in my school were fraternal in their attraction toward the best looking and richest guys in class …. and the rest …. the ones that might pay attention me were either cows or dogs ….I did not have girl friends in school but boy oh boy once I graduated, I got what I thought was the hottest chick on the block and we were married for 33 years until she passed away from cancer. But “Relationships” in my school were turf reserved for somebody else besides me …I might add that it all changed after graduation when I began to pay everybody’s way into everything and to buy all the gas for all my friends’ cars …. it was madness …

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  7. Great post 🙂 I never really had a love relationship, but as with a lot of us, I did have celebrity crushes 🙂 In fact, If you asked me who my biggest crush is to this day, my answer (one of them at least) would be actress Theresa Russell 🙂 Anyway, keep up the great work as always 🙂

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      1. She may still be, but the last time (at least based on my knowledge) that I saw a picture of her at an event was either 2011 or 2012 for some TV film. Before I give you that link, here is a list of my favorite films of hers (in chronological order) where she is the standout or one of the standouts

        1. Straight Time (1978) (Dir: Ulu Grosbard)
        2. Bad Timing (1980) (Dir: Nicolas Roeg)
        3. Eureka (1983) (Dir: Nicolas Roeg)
        4. Insignificance (1985) (Dir: Nicolas Roeg)
        5. Aria (1987) (Dir: Nicolas Roeg) (Segment: “Un ballo in maschera) (Anthology Film)
        6. Black Widow (1987) (Dir: Bob Rafelson)
        7. Track 29 (1988) (Dir: Nicolas Roeg)
        8. Cold Heaven (1991) (Dir: Nicolas Roeg)
        9. Whore (1991) (Dir: Ken Russell)
        10. Hotel Paradise (1995) (Dir: Nicolas Roeg) (I watched when it was online – hard item to find) (Short Cinema)
        11. Wild Things (1998) (Dir: John McNaughton)

        Okay, now here is a youtube video link of her from 2011 and she still looks beautiful as ever 🙂

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  8. Not exactly a long term relationship, Pete. 😎 I was never in the business of humiliating kids who passed notes in my elementary classroom, but perhaps the funniest one I ever intercepted was written by one of the girls who asked a sixth-grade boy, “Do you want to go with me until recess?”

    I spared the young couple of embarrassment by not reading her words aloud, but I couldn’t help but think, “How exactly do you ‘go with someone’ in the middle of class?”

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    1. I think that still qualiies as the shortest ‘date’ I ever had. Though two years later I had a new ‘girlfriend’ who I accompanied to the cinema on two occasions, with me buying the tickets When we emerged into the daylight after the second ‘date’, she broke up with me. That lasted slightly longer than my one day with Ann. 🙂
      Best wishes, Pete.

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  10. My first crush was on my 7th Grade teacher. In my ’67 yearbook, she wrote this (exactly as it appears next to a group photo of Language Arts teachers):

    David—
    Work hard—
    but don’t forget
    to have fun, too—
    & I wish you the
    best of luck next
    year in your
    new school
    Mrs Palmer

    Mrs. Palmer was a young teacher with blonde hair in a straight bob. She wore dark-rimmed glasses. And even today, looking at her photo in my (ahem!) Trojan yearbook, I find her very attractive! Of course, she is probably in her late 70’s now.

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  11. My first major love was Charlotte a French girl when I lived on Mallorca…..my first real relationship was with Regina “Gypsy” Falcone when I was a senior in high school/…..damn those memories were the great times in one’s life…thanx for making me relive them…..chuq

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  13. Oh, she was a bold one but I found your recalling of it all amusing. I am in training for telling my grandmother that no boys allowed on her mind or otherwise till she is at least 21. Lol.

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    1. She was one of a few ‘forward girls’ at my school, Robbie. Most were far more retiring. But they were maturing much faster than us boys, that’s for sure. Even I was surprised by Ann at the time. It was only 1964! 🙂
      Best wishes, Pete.

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  17. Oh the embarrassment of it all! I remember a boy called Alan in my class when I was about 11. He sent a note to me under the desks via his mates. The note said he wanted to meet me at the school gates after lessons ended, and then he would kiss me. I ran out of school the back way and legged it all the way home! Next day he’d told all his mates that he had kissed me – the little rascal.

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