The first line of this fictional short story was sent to my by American blogger, Beth.
https://ididnthavemyglasseson.com/
Waking up in a cornfield still dressed in her habit, with nothing but a candle, a half-eaten almond joy bar, and a small mewing kitten gave her pause…
Nessa could feel a stiffness in her joints, indicating to her that she had been in that field for a long time, probably overnight. Her mouth was bone dry, and the fingers of her left hand felt cramped from gripping the large votive candle. What was left of the candy bar was covered in bits of earth and attracting tiny insects, and the kitten’s face had been so close to hers, she had jumped up in alarm as her eyes had opened.
Slowly coming round, she started to get flashbacks of the day before, like jump cuts in a movie.
It had started three weeks earlier, with a ‘phone call from Morrie, her agent.
“Vanessa baby! Have I got a great job for you!” He always seemed to shout on the phone. “The people at Almond Joy are looking for an attractive older actress to star in a TV commercial for their candy bars. I have put you forward for it, and there is a first call this afternoon. My secretary has sent the details to your cellphone, so get your gladrags on and knock ’em dead!”
At her age, any work was welcome. Gone were the days when Vanessa DeRoy could get regular work as the attractive best friend, the secretary desired by the boss, or even the good-looking mature wife opening the door to receive a UPS parcel from a grinning delivery man. It was all a long way from her younger days, and the more risque parts she was associated with back then. Once mainstream movies and respectable actresses began to show everything, her video-market movies had stopped being made.
Sure, there was still a fan base, even though most of them were in care homes by now. But the best that Morrie could do for her most of the time was face in a crowd stuff, a happy lottery winner waving an oversized ticket, or someone considering the purchase of a trailer in a retirement complex, nodding in approval. They said sixty was the new forty, but they had forgotten to include her.
The agency guys working for Almond Joy had loved her though. They wanted a Mother Superior character who was more excited about the candy bars than her religion, and she had fit the bill nicely. Nessa had been hopeful. Getting back on TV would make a nice change from late-night shifts packing boned chickens, and if Morrie got her a deal including repeat fees, it might well be the start of something.
Molly was the costume lady who fixed her up. “You look great in a habit, honey. Should have been a nun”. The costume was surprisingly heavy, and the headdress felt tight. The thick black pantyhose were hot on a summer’s day, and the heavy black shoes rubbed her ankles. But she was a pro, and when she left the trailer, she felt she looked the part completely.
Such as it was, the theme of the commercial was so much nonsense. Long ago, Nessa had stopped thinking about the crazy ideas those advertising guys came up with, so she just went with the flow. The nerdy director looked like he should have been in his bedroom playing vdeo games, but she paid him the same respect as if he had been Orson Welles.
“Okay, you get the idea. Mother Superior has never had an Almond Joy bar before. She takes one bite, looks up at the sky with delight on her face, and goes running into the cornfield, flinging away the candle she was holding”.
She nodded and smiled as if she had just been give the starring role in Gone With The Wind. “Got it, thanks for the opportunity”.
Fifteen takes later, she was sweating like a horse that had just won the Kentucky Derby, and feeling sick from the numerous bites of the chocolate covered candy. Then the guy called for a lunch break, and they went to the wagon parked at the edge of the field. How many takes did he want? How many times can you run into a cornfield looking up a the sky, and flinging away a candle?
Around the back of the portable facilities, Molly offered a flask. “Try some of this, honey. Take the edge off. If Miles has his way, he will keep you running into that field until after dark”. It made Nessa’s eyes screw up, tasting like some home-made hooch she had once tried in Kentucky, back in the seventies. But Molly was right. It took the edge off.
The afternoon had been something of a blur. At one stage, she had taken off the heavy shoes, and Miles had made her go and change the pantyhose as the heels of the shoes had torn them. But he had gone with the idea of her being shoeless, making out like it had been his idea all along. “Yes, no shoes. Another reference to her new freedom”. In the tent where she went to change the pantyhose, Molly had produced another flask.
Some time later, she recalled that Miles had seemed very pleased. “Fantastic! That’s a wrap! You really captured that wild spirit of a lifetime of religious frustration, and the joy of throwing off those shackles. Thank you, Miss DeRoy”.
That was when she had started running, and not stopped running. It had never dawned on her just how big a cornfield could be. Not until she collaped exhausted, anyway.
But she had absolutely no idea where the kitten had come from.
You have wooven a very interesting and entertaining story around the fate of poor Molly. xx Michael
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Molly was the costime lady! Vanessa was the actress. 🙂
Best wishes, Pete.
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Reblogged this on OPENED HERE >> https:/BOOKS.ESLARN-NET.DE.
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Poor Molly, but it really was funny. You pulled this one off, Pete!
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Glad to hear that, Jennie. This was the hardest prompt.
(But Molly was the costume lady, Vanesa was the actress.)
Best wishes, Pete.
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Oh this is so rich, C
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Thanks, Cheryl. Beth set me the hardest first line of all of them.
Best wishes, Pete.
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Loved it!!
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Thanks, Kate. Very happy to hear that.
Best wishes, Pete.
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Ah! The joy of freedom after a life of religious frustration! 😀
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That was my hardest prompt line of the lot, Shaily.
Best wishes, Pete.
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so well done, pete. i had no idea if you would ever use this, and what a clever way to tie it all together! you are a master of this game. on a side note, i noticed that wpress had unfollowed you on my behalf, for no reason. this has been happening with some of the sites i follow, as well as some who follow me. no explanation from them, but it seems to all have been in the last year. who knows what they are doing behind the scenes, but happy to see your posts again. )
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I had to rise to your challenge, Beth. It was the hardest of all the first lines sent to me. 🙂
WP unfollowing people is a regular glitch. At the moment, I am losing notification emails of some of the bloggers I follow, so I have to check on their sites instead. This kind of activity normally signals when WP is about to make some significant chancges.
Best wishes, Pete.
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I had wondered if you could pull it off, well done! yes, the wp gremlins are clearly at play again
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Wow! I don’t think I’d have come up with anything at all. Fabulous and very funny! Thanks, Pete! I take my hat off!
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Thanks, Olga. That was definitely the most challenging first line.
Best wishes, Pete.
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Reading the first line? It seemed a challenging beginning. Apparently, though, you were quite up to the task. Bravo Pete!
Oh, and I also learned something, which I always love: “Macguffin” – Who knew?
Well, apparently ‘you’ knew 😉
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I did know, Chris. In almost 70 years, I have watched a great many films!
Best wishes, Pete.
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It took a wild imagination to do something from that prompt. Congratulations on a job well done, Pete.
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Thanks very much, Don. Luckily, I have always had a rather wild imagination. 🙂
Best wishes, Pete.
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Had the kitten been in any of the takes? Where did the kitten come from? Regardless, you did an artful job of where the Nun came from. Warmest regards, Theo
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The kitten is ‘The Macguffin’, Theo. 🙂
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MacGuffin
Best wishes, Pete.
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Don’t tell the kitten it is irrelevant. Warmest regards, Theo
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I’m not sure if I read this sentence right: “You really captured that wild spirit of a lifetime of religious frustration, and the Almond Joy of throwing off those candy bar wrappers.”
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That sums it up, David. 🙂
Best wishes, Pete.
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Very inventive, Pete!
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Thanks, Sue. Glad you liked it.
Best wishes, Pete.
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I was sure you would have her hit by lightning. I loved how inventive you were with the sentence. I would have never arrived anywhere near the point you so delightfully did.
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Thanks very much, Elizabeth. I confess that a lightning strike never once occured to me. 🙂
Best wishes, Pete.
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Next story maybe.
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Great last line, had me laughing 🙂 You have some imagination Pete 🙂
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Thanks, Eddy. That imagination has got me in more trouble than I care to tell about! 🙂
Cheers, Pete.
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Nice job with a very tricky prompt indeed!
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Thanks, John. I felt I had to avoid a fancy dress party (costume party) as being too obvious, so this was the next idea that came to me.
Best wishes, Pete.
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Ha hs. Homemade hooch is dangerous. Poor kitty though. I hope she kept him.
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I doubt she had a choice but to keep the kitten, Carolyn.
Best wishes, Pete.
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Great story, Pete. I remember going to a fancy dress party dressed as a nun many moons ago…
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A Fancy Dress party was actually my first thought, Stevie. I went with a crazy TV ad instead! 🙂
(Because of the inclusion of the choclate bar)
Best wishes, Pete.
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Great prompt from Beth, wonderful take by you..
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Thanks, Geoff. I had to really think about Beth’s first line. 🙂
Best wishes, Pete.
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That home-made hooch sure hit the sweet spot for Nessa, Pete 👍😂🤣😂
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Let’s hope her dash into the cornfields didn’t stop her getting more work in future, Chris. 🙂
Best wishes, Pete.
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😂🤣😂
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Nice progression based on the interesting first line you were given, Pete.
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Thanks, Maggie. That was a tricky line! 🙂
For one thing, I had no idea what an Almond Joy bar was.
Best wishes, Pete.
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This is my first time reading your blog, and I will definitely return! Your writing is beautiful and transfixing. I really feel like Vanessa and I could be friends 😆
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Thanks for your kind words. 🙂
Best wishes, Pete.
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Loved that, how clever!
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Thanks very much, Lucinda. Beth gave me a tricky first line, so I had to think about it.
Best wishes, Pete.
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😀 😀 funny one Pete 🙂
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Something lighter, for a change. 🙂
Best wishes, Pete.
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Great little tale Pete.. I hope this wasn’t one of the repeats she mentioned though.
Hugs
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Thanks very much, David.
Best wishes, Pete.
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Yeah…I’m first for once…Nice one,Pete again a cracker of an ending leaving us just a little bit wondering 🙂 x
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Thanks Carol. Beth set me a very tricky prompt! 🙂
Best wishes, Pete. x
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Yes I can imagine, Pete.. It just shows how good you are though.. 😀 X
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