So I was hanging out in Cana, some tiny dustbowl town in the Galilee district. I got myself invited to a wedding, along with my bad-boy crew, Disciples Unlimited. Why not? Free food, plenty to drink, and the chance of a dance with a sultry maiden. (And maybe more? Wink-wink!) I accepted, of course!
As usual, I could see a way to make some money out of this event, and to boost my street cred into the bargain. As anyone knows, the wine soons runs out at weddings, especially when it is free to guests. So I got my pal John to secrete some amphoras of good Cyrpus wine under the covered table, just in case.
It wasn’t long before Mary, my mom, suggests that I could help out with the impending wine shortage. By that time, we were down to drinking water, and that was putting a real downer on the festivities.
So I gave mom a wink, and waved my signal to John. Then I sashayed over to the table, real casual like, covering John as he exchanged the water amphoras for those containing wine. I said some holy stuff, I forget now exactly what, and the wedding guests stood around gaping, their mouths like fresh-landed fish from the nearby Sea of Galilee. I motioned to the servants to fill the clay pots with water, but as they were already almost full to the brim with that Cypriot good stuff, they only took around a cup of water in each.
Then I raised my hands, winked at my mom and John, before telling the guests to help themselves to more of the good stuff. I had changed that water into wine. ( π )
Everyone was completely drunk by the end of the festivities, and some said that the groom as too far gone to do his nuptial duties, but I cannot confirm that.
On the plus side, the bride’s dad gave me a bag of silver talents for my trouble. Of course, I had to split it with mom and John, but I only gave them twenty-five percent each.
To be honest, I wish I could have played that scam at a lot more weddings!
Peace and love.
Back soon, my fellow bloggers. Stay righteous!
Very amusing, Pete.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Robbie. I am just trying to ‘lighten up’ a bit.
Best wishes, Pete.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hilarious! π€£π€£π€£ More please.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Debbie. More on the way.
Best wishes, Pete.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I tried to subscribe to your blog, but it has come back as ‘expired’. No idea why. Sorry!
LikeLike
I just got a confirmation. Hooray.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Great- thanks for subscribing. π
LikeLike
Oh no! Were you using the blue follow button, or the subscribe widget in the side bar/footer?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sorted now. Email notifications. x
LikeLiked by 1 person
π
LikeLiked by 1 person
love this fun series Pete)
LikeLiked by 1 person
Happy to hear that, Beth.
Best wishes, Pete.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Nice one. Pity it wasn’t John Smiths!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I think turning water into beer was done by Ind Coope brewery, Jack. π
Best wishes, Pete.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I think you have your mojo back. Warmest regards, Theo
LikeLiked by 1 person
These have been in draft for some time, Theo. I guessed they might upset some people but decided to post them anyway.
Best wishes, Pete.
LikeLike
I am suddenly out of my element here, everybody, forgive me for not wanting to join in on the fun of mocking God.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Being a Christian this is not my favorite. However, carry on.
LikeLiked by 1 person
These posts are not for everyone, John. A diversion for me though.
Best wishes, Pete.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Enjoy your diversion then, Pete.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Blogginβ J.C. isn’t he that famous rapper? π
LikeLiked by 2 people
He was number one in Nazareth, Jerusalem, and Bethlehem, but it took him a long time to break into Europe and America, Eddy.
Cheers, Pete.
LikeLiked by 2 people
This is a slap in the face of Jesus Christ, The Savior and has nothing to do with a rapper at all.
LikeLike
…and there’s blog number 2! What next…
LikeLiked by 2 people
I suspect there will be more from him. I will reblog them of course.
Best wishes, Pete.
LikeLiked by 2 people
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thanks very much for the link, Dreamer.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Cana wine trick work? Yes! But then someone asked J.C., “Can you make a boneless fish jump from the sea right into my mouth?” That would have been a trick on a different scale…
LikeLiked by 2 people
Groaaaan! π
Best wishes, Pete.
LikeLiked by 1 person