34 thoughts on “Friday Funnies: Airlines Special”

  3. (1) Thought the person on the floor, “Oh, to breathe again!”
    (2) “What we’ve got here is failure to communicate.” (You’ll have to hand it to me, I came up with a cool movie quote! I had to luke all over the internet to find it!)
    (3) Crew envy also afflicted the Lucayan people of San Salvador back in 1492.
    (4) “No, doc. I can’t find a way to join the Mile High Club, and that’s got me down!”
    (5) Well, at least the old hag speaks the plane truth.
    (6) Claiming there’s no elbow room simply won’t fly.
    (7) “And if we plunge into the ocean, we’ll provide scuba gear and shark repellent for a for an extra $75, subject to a credit check.”
    (8) Dwayne Gertz later became a successful politician, and was assigned an aide to buckle his seat belt for him on international junkets.
    (9) This is what happens when Santa’s sleigh fails to pass an FAA inspection (and the North Pole’s mechanics are on holiday leave).
    (10) More likely: “Due to an unexpected polar vortex hitting Libreville, all flights to Gabon have been delayed until further notice.”
    (11) Is he driving a Honda Pilot?
    (12) Overheard:
    Passenger: “And my name is Barf Simpson. Will this be a smooth flight?”
    Flight attendant: “Your pilot is the best. So, yes, a smooth flight is in the bag.”
    (13) Can you actually fall asleep on a 787 Dreamliner?

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  7. I couldn’t stop laughing at the first one!

    When I worked in the business lounges at Heathrow one of the staff had actually been cabin crew, but decided she was not cut out for it. As the makers of coffee and servers of sandwiches we had more time to chat to the passengers than Airline staff. One time she found herself telling a passenger she stopped flying when the family next door were all killed in a plane crash!

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  18. Pingback: Friday Funnies: Airlines Special | Ned Hamson's Second Line View of the News

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