I have just watched a detailed report on the BBC. It appears that a huge study, undertaken in America and Europe, has established that drinking at least three cups of coffee every day will make you live longer. Over 18% of those male coffee drinkers lived longer than those who never drank any coffee, and for women, the figure was lower, at 8%. And no need to go caffeine-free either. It makes no difference, according to these medical geniuses.
Not that long ago, other medical experts considered that coffee was little better than poison. They urged us to stop drinking it, or face medical problems, and early death. Now they have changed their minds. Too late for everyone who gave it up though, and now risk dying earlier than the heavy coffee drinkers who ignored that advice.
I have lived long enough to see many such ‘expert studies’ bandied about on the news, and in the press.
I am old enough to remember when some doctors urged people to smoke, as it was ‘good for the lungs’. As I child, I was constantly fed carrots, to supposedly improve my sight. Then in later life, I made sure to take a lot of vitamin C, because the experts told us it was essential. They just forgot to mention that it would also destroy my stomach lining, and leave me with decades of acid indigestion.
Eat lots of fruit! Five a day, fruit and vegetables. That might stop you getting cancer. Or might not. Drink lots of orange juice, or other fruit juices. Much healthier than fizzy drinks. They forgot about fruit acids and sugars ruining your teeth though. I’m sure that particular pearl of wisdom was started by dentists.
What about eggs? They give you high cholesterol, apparently. Very bad for your arteries, so stop eating them. Now! Oh, hang on, they are not that bad for you at all really, as the cholesterol in eggs is good for you, as opposed to being bad cholesterol. But it doesn’t matter either way, as you now have Statins to combat cholesterol. So, eat what you want within reason, as long as you take lots of Statins for the rest of your life. But they forgot to tell me something else. Statins can also destroy muscle tissue, which migrates into your liver, and causes problems for life. And that muscle doesn’t grow back, so forget doing any heavy work. Forever.
Drink some red wine every day. It’s very good for you, according to the experts. It helps with blood flow, reduces the risk of strokes, and it also tastes good! Hold on a minute! Not THAT much red wine. That much is bad for you, and will enlarge your liver, cause high blood pressure, and make blood clotting harder.
Sugar is very bad for you. It provides short-term energy, affects your teeth, and can make you obese. Cut out the sugar. All of it! Use artificial sweeteners instead. According to the experts, Aspartame is a good alternative, so try that. Be careful though, because different experts will tell you that it will give you bladder cancer. So, once you have died from that, it doesn’t really matter how fat you might have got, or how many times you needed some dental work.
I am so sick and tired of ‘experts’. Fed up with their pointless pontifications, their ‘sponsored studies’, their pompous pronouncements. Listening to them harp on about their theories is like watching a tennis match, with my head swivelling from side to side, trying to make out which side is actually doing something right. You can be certain of something though.
What is good for you today, will surely be bad for you tomorrow.